Friday, 23 March 2012

glass half something

It's been a huge couple of weeks. I've been wanting to write about all the good stuff that's happening, about moving into our wonderful house, about graduating from college. But unfortunately, the undertow of depression has had hold of me, and all I can think of is bad, sad, negative stuff. So I don't really want to go on at length about that, at least not until I've written about the good things.

Maybe I'll find the energy to do that soon. Apologies.

Monday, 12 March 2012

in between

We're in the middle of moving to our new house. We got the keys on Friday, and after some packing and cleaning with wonderful helpers at Maroubra, we went over to South Hurstville and excitedly jumped around in our new house!

Being back at the Maroubra house is weird though. All the cupboards and shelves are empty, except for the things we're still using (eg clothes, kitchen stuff). Mum and I are both completely exhausted, but muster the energy every so often to make up another box and put yet more of our stuff in. It seems we've thrown or given away or sold so much of our stuff, and yet there is still so. much. stuff. It's good to cull. But hard. And wearying.

But after Tuesday, when the removalists take all our furniture over, we will be finally moved in and no longer living in between two houses. Less than 48 hours but it seems so far away!

Sunday, 4 March 2012


Sometimes I really hate being an introvert. Especially at times like church weekends away. I'll be in a room full of people I love and whose company I enjoy, yet feel entirely alone and like I need to run away. I think people who don't know me well assume I'm not as introverted as all that because I'm always involved and up the front doing something. But it's all a ruse!

It's taken all my energy at this weekend I'm away on at the moment to stay here, and not to drive home for the night as soon as dinner finished. And It's not like I'm having a bad time! I'm just so thoroughly drained from being with people all day. I look at those playing games and having hilarious, raucous conversations with great envy.

The tiredness from too many people also exacerbates emotions because i was already feeling a bit low, it's just made me feel incredibly sad. And to compensate for feeling rotten, and to try and keep my energy at a level where I can participate in even a short chat, I've eaten far too much fatty and sugary food. Which doesn't help at all.

Sometimes I really hate being an introvert.